HOW TO REWARD GOOD PERFORMANCE SO IT HITS THE MARK
A Pick’n’Mix Recipe
Positive reinforcement, sweet words of thanks, a show of gratitude – all good stuff. Increases engagement and satisfaction, lifts performance and creates a surge of goodwill, effort and trust. And yet, in a study of 7,621 leaders, 37% conceded that they avoid giving positive reinforcement (1). Does that shock you? Or is it a relief to hear that you’re not alone? Maybe the feedback you give isn’t quite on the money and getting the results you expect – or hope – it might. If your positive feedback/forward/appreciation is hitting the mark, keep at it. And there are several things you can consider to enhance your skill, or just to get the ball rolling. I like to reference the work of Dr Gary Chapman and Dr Paul White (2), and hope they’ll appreciate my additions and spin.
Challenges in giving positive reinforcement
It’s cringy and awkward
Lots of things are when we first start trying them out. Practice is your friend! Consider how you feel when you’re on the receiving end of a compliment. Do you feel awkward, cringe or deny it outright? If that’s the case then you may be avoiding giving acknowledgement because your empathetic self doesn’t want your colleague to feel the same discomfort. Lovely though that empathy is, it may also be more of a reflection on you, than it is of their needs. If they do find it awkward, then try a different language (there’s a list of these, read on!). Biases like this are fine, when we’re aware of them and take them into account. Giving acknowledgement can feel as good as receiving it. If you become addicted to the crack you’re handing out, check in on the sincerity of the compliments and your intentions. This is about validating the person you’re acknowledging. You feeling good about it is a beautiful by-product.
They’ll think I’m sucking up to them
Only if you’re insincere or making it up.
It’s not our culture
Really? What if it became your culture?? Even if this behaviour isn’t modelled by your colleagues and leaders, you can make it a part of your game. Decreasing burnout, healthier relationships, and higher job satisfaction are all benefits of showing appreciation.
I’m too busy, and they know they do a good job. There aren’t a lot of specific goals, or they don’t always meet them
Do they? How do they know?? The power of people feeling valued is huge. Valuing effort as well as measurable results is an industrial strength formula for increasing motivation. In particular, the recognition of effort increases intrinsic motivation to push on, regardless of what else is going on.
I give positive recognition all the time. They just don’t appreciate it
Then try harder, or smarter. Just like we have different leadership styles, we have different ‘languages’ of appreciation. A pat on the shoulder may be a big deal to you, whereas to someone else the gift of a coffee means the world. Different people will value different languages of appreciation more than others, and using a lesser-valued language may not resonate.
It’s not my job
Damn well is. Or it should be. Especially if you want your leadership and teamwork to shine, to be influential and effective.
Pick’n’mix languages
And in case anyone notices, coffee comes up a lot. Is certainly a valued currency of mine!
Words
praise for a job well done
recognition of good character
one to one
witnessed by others
public
in writing, either by hand or by email
needs to be specific
Quality time
giving an individual your focused attention
quality conversation
sharing an experience
checking in, in person, by phone or by email
an off-site retreat
go for a walk, or play a sport
a lunch or coffee conversation
Acts of Service
helping in some way
ask permission first
carry a bag or box, make their coffee
anything that saves time or effort
Gifts
it needs to be something that a person values
time off is a fantastic gift
so is food, or coffee
Physical touch
Clearly, it needs to be appropriate
a handshake or pat on the shoulder
fist bumps (still just cool enough), and high fives (borderline cool)
hugs might be okay where you work, keep them brief and not creepy
Not on the list
Formal awards and top-down recognition shouldn’t be ruled out. And they’re not always the most effective ways of showing appreciation either. Timeliness may be a problem, as can the sincerity of company-mandated awards.
Informal language diagnostics
People tend to have a language that resonates best. When praise falls flat, try another language
observe their behaviour and ways they show appreciation
notice what they ask of others
listen to what brasses them off. The opposite of what they complain about could well be what they’re looking for
There’s no right or wrong, just more and less useful. Have a play and notice how effective your acknowledgment and positive reinforcement are. And when you do, acknowledge your own growth – always remember to throw a few favourites your way too!
Hit me up for more of this stuff, or cut out the middle man and let's talk.
References
Why do so many managers avoid giving praise? Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman. Via Harvard Business Review, May 2017
The 5 languages of appreciation in the workplace. Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Paul White
