HOW DO YOU TELL A LEADER THAT THEY ARE THE PROBLEM?
We all know that a fish rots from the head first.
When you think about your organisation, where is the rot setting in?
There's a lot of 'leading up' required in some organisations, and a lot of excuses made at the top. Being at ‘the top’ by its nature asks a leader to look to the people below them when there is a need for behavioural change.
Too many teams are in a situation where the leader assumes all problems are at the team level when it’s the leader that is robbing them of their potential and shitting all over company performance. The conversations needed to sort that out aren't easy, and have the potential to be extremely career-limiting!! How do you have a conversation with a leader who doesn't realise they're the problem?
Why even bother to call a leader on their uncomfortable truth?
It’s usually because the reality has become untenable and that company performance is affected. Often it’s because people have started looking for someone to point the finger at, and a team is rapidly becoming dysfunctional. The risk is that once the rot sets in, it’s harder to cleanse. Culture and climate will suffer, and the bottom line will be close behind.
First thing - even if you believe you are perfect in every way and that the sun shines out of your lovely proverbial, you have to take some responsibility too. In every environment, people instinctively develop patterns of behaviour and create expectations of each other that get reinforced and then become habits. You are a part of the problem, and fortunately a part of the solution.
What’s needed is a close look at the problem behaviours.
To lay them out bare and see the negative effect that they are having. That may feel very uncomfortable because it should. Unless you are on the verge of a mild buttock-clenching terror, you are probably skirting around the real issues. That buttock clench is a good sign that you are getting to the point. Once you have the issues under the spotlight you can support each other to use your strengths and create new habits that will get you the results you want.
When I have these conversations with leaders and teams, I always start with agreements on how the conversation is going to be done:
talk about the behaviours, not the personalities
consider the system, not the individuals
look for opportunities and talk about what you want to happen, rather than what needs to change
use actual data, rather than opinions
I’d love to say that’s all it takes and that everyone will love the process, but honestly, even done well it’s pretty raw and can be painful. And, with courage, vulnerability and a tonne of role modeling it is possible to communicate to a leader that they are the one that needs to change.
